Ok... now I'm angry... 

All this bloody frustration is getting to me. I'm sick and I'm about five seconds from from taking some form of sharp implement and stabbing those fucking idiots in the living room. They're sitting out there like children, screaming and wrestling. If this pissed me off anymore, I would go out there and seperate them myself.

FUCK I'm angry! I haven't been this mad in a long time and I really don't like it. I hate having to bottle up everything. I have no choise, if I want to be in public I must... but they're really starting to get on my nerves...

Caleb for exaample... since him and his new girlfriend starteed going out, he has increasingly become more and more like the fucking prick I knew for a while in 100 mile. And matt! I know him and meri are going through troubles, but if he waves the fact of how much he screws up infront of my face and what he still has, I'm going to put a fucking crowbar in his eye! I have goddamed HAD ENOUGH!

It's not only that! Every time I try and say or do anything, one of those two is overriding it or taking over! Half the time I think I should just stop fucking talking. It'd be a god dammed improvement.

I try and be polite, I try and be nice however... I fail. I can't judge peoples emotions which leaves me at a stopping point... I dare not get close to anyone because of the fact that I know I can't read them, which means that when I try to trust someone I fail. You have no idea how many times I have tried and almost ended up crying myself to sleep... that's if I sleep.

That's another thing that's pissing me off.... I don't know why, but I find it hard to sleep anym,ore... I don't sleep... just toss and turn... and eventually wake up. Truth be told, I haven't really slept much since me and mel broke up...

That reminds me of another thing.... Mel started talking to me again... Which is worrying me. Something inside says that she's up to something, and I tried to be as inspecific as possible... but I kept her contact. I want to know what she is up to...

Which adds to the plate.

the other thing I've been thinking of is... moving. I don't know why, and I don't know where... but something inside me is screaming that something bad is going to happen. This is the same thing I got before everything went to shit with my uncle and me. something is goiing to happen... I don't know what, but it's going to be bad...

AGHHHHHHHHHHH! Fuck! I'm getting fucking tired of all this. Just too fucking tired.